The fact I'm here at all is kind of a surprise, and sort of last minute too.
About three months ago I had just got back from a month detachment to Leuchars (the boss called me on Thursday and asked if I could be there for Tuesday morning - I said sure, but you're paying for the hotel!) and the boss pops into the office for a quick chat.
"You know how you said you don't mind working over Christmas as long as you get some time at home with your friends?" he said.
"Yes," I replied, already expecting bad things.
"How would you feel about doing that, but somewhere a bit different?"
The whole "spend some time at home" thing seems to have gone out the window here.
"Where, exactly?" I asked.
"Ascension. Next month. Until January."
In between I went to Pippa and John's wedding, which was brilliant, and ended up having more time off than I was expecting owing to a change of flight date, which was nice.
If you've never been here (and statistically, that's everyone) this is a little island 8 degrees south, 14 degrees west in the Atlantic. And I do mean little, it's about 10 km a side and roughly triangular, there's heavy showers 3 months of the year, drizzly showers (which shouldn't happen but given how humid it is any kind of shower drops the visibility down to almost nothing) 4 months of the year and tropical sunshine the rest of the time. The time I'm here for is end of the drizzly showers and into the hot season. Or that was the initial plan.
I've known a few people that have got here and then been bumped straight south to the Falklands so I made some plans. On my bed at home I left a bag packed with cold weather gear and told Sarah that if I got pushed south she should post it out and I'd get the Office to pay back the postage. I also packed some basic cold kit because I'd be coming back to the UK in the middle of January from a hot little island, chances are I'd want something warm!
On the first day here I dumped my bags into the transit room (my permanent room was still being used by the guy I was replacing), went to the beach, went snorkelling and got sun burned. When we got back the boss had just finished his shift and asked a couple of us over for a quiet word.
The other guy, Donald, as heading to the Falklands for a few weeks anyway but they had asked if he could come down a bit earlier. They had also asked if there was anyone else they could borrow for a month.
I laughed aloud at that.
In the time I had before I went south I got stuck into the work here, which is weird. The actual shifts are fine, there isn't very much to do; forecasting the drizzly showers, however, is a nightmare. There's no good model data, the satellites aren't much cop and just when you want good imagery the sun sets or rises and you lose the definition from the satellites. The next nearest observation is St Helena, 300 odd miles southeast, so not all that much help there.
But I did get out for some swimming (and had a toe bitten by a fish), went for a walk on the side of Green Mountain and enjoyed warm evenings with a gin and tonic - shortly turning that into warm evenings with a martini, including olives. Having moved into the en suite room at Travellers hill I was properly able to enjoy the pace of life here.
Three weeks after arriving I was back on the aircraft heading south again. The company running the airbridge had changed to HiFly and although the aircraft itself was a bit old and ragged no one minded because the on board entertainment took the form of iPads that were handed around.
I was actually in the Falklands as an observer/forecast support, which meant hourly observations, nightly weather balloon launches and lots of admin stuff. I managed to get to the gym around 3 times a week (something I need to start up again) and until I knackered my knee I was up to the third week of the couch to 5 K plan.
It was a great little tour and makes it 4 trips in 5 years, with next years already booked - I'll need it to pay for going to Tris' wedding and stag do! Although I didn't get out all that much it was a good time.
The four weeks down there passed very quickly and then it was back to the Island, this time when I got into the room and opened the door to the en suite shower/loo room I was greeted by 4 huge cockroaches. Or at least they looked huge to me. I'm not sure what the official international size range is for them but their bodies were around 2 inches long! Taken me 4 days to get rid of them all and I'm still wary of the shower!
I think the resident lizard might be sorting them out though, so that should be a plus.
We're still getting some showers (just had to move inside to stop my Mac from getting wet) but they seem to be dying out. There was a Movember variety night on Saturday when the 6 movers (responsible for getting the aircraft in, sorting out the luggage and passengers etc), all male, did a talent show/Miss Ascension Island competition with songs, dancing, magic tricks, swim-wear competitions (yes, one of them was in drag in a mankini) and general fun. On Monday night they threw a pizza party at their lounge (we can't call them bars) which most of the camp turned up for and that was another really good night.
Basically, I'm enjoying life here (apart from the bugs but it's a tropical island with a dodgy pipe system so there's not a huge amount I can do about that) and I'll try to add some more photos before I leave.
I'm going to try to get some underwater pictures and the turtles will be back on the island over the coming months so that will be something to see.
Oh I'm also doing Movember again.
I know it looks like I'm missing a bit on my left hand side in the picture but it's just a bit thin there.
Not as bad as my beard-of-shame though:
Now for a serious decision. Do I go to the gym, go to the beach, have a drink or do all of them in order? Oh the harsh life I lead :)
