Right, been a while but here we go with a catch up. The little story thing pretty much went as I’d thought it would, thanks for the feedback though Rich! I’m sure I’ll have missed something that’s happened in the time since my last full post, but the main things since I passed my IAM (still woohoo about that!) are that I applied for a new job at work and did some walking.


Ok, maybe it’s a bit more complicated than that.

The new job wasn’t actually a new job but a 3 months secondment to a place called Rothera. To say that I was rather keen to go would be an understatement and pretty much all the indications were that I had a good shot at it. The position had been massively undersubscribed in previous years and I had Southern Hemisphere experience, winter experience and could put a tick in all the boxes on the application form.
But alas, it was not to be. Once the sift date had gone past and then a bit of extra time had lapsed I gave HR a call and was told that it wasn’t their department. Next day (hmmmmm, bit suspicious about the timing) I got the email saying that I had been unsuccessful in my application. I asked for some feedback but so far haven’t received any; there’s almost no point asking HR about it at the moment as we’re in the middle of a pay offer so they are all busy telling people that they’re not really getting a £5000 pay cut, it just looks that way.

So, one disappointment down, but now I may get the chance to spend Christmas with my girlfriend and some mates in Switzerland. So, not all bad.

Tash and Chris came up again for the Summer Ball, which had waltzers, a surfing simulator, laser clay pigeon shooting, FOOD, drink, more food and other posh entertainments (but not of the “masked ball” variety).

Chris and Tasha on the surf simulator. Yes, I did go on it, and did quite well, but unfortunately I don't have any pictures of that. Shame.
Week later we met up again, this time at a camping site in the Cairngorms, in preparation for the big walk – the Wolftrek 45 mile jaunt from Forres to Cairngorm. In the end I had to bin first, partly due to feet but mainly my knee was about to collapse; so I stacked at 17 miles, Tasha made 32 and Chris and Venora managed the whole 45 miles, swearing never to do anything as silly EVER AGAIN.
The time for their 45 miles was 19 hr 15 minutes, which was pretty damn good, but a bit longer than the fastest guy, who completed the route in 6 hr 52 min. ^-^
We had started out at a decent pace for the route, about 3 miles an hour, which we felt we could sustain, and which was about the right pace to get a time on par with the average from the last year’s pack. Problem was that everyone started off in a big bunch, mainly at the pace of the people who were only planning to do the first section. Pretty soon we were at the back, which isn’t a problem really, just a bit disheartening.
By the end some 40% had dropped out. Our team was the last to reach the first, second and third/last checkpoints but Chris and Venora finished in the middle of the pack, mainly as they didn’t get caught out by stopping in the comfy chairs at Glenmore Lodge.
Three days later I get a message from Chris asking if I was up for trying to beat the time next year. Ha! So much for never again!

Kate is up visiting, and we’re trying to successfully use the bread maker that Tasha and Chris got for me, but my first attempt was less than brilliant.

We also went to see Coraline over the weekend, a Neil Gaiman film that you can tell is one of his stories for children by the way it’s dark and quite disturbing. Good though, especially the cat.

I'm going to try something a bit silly

Well actually I've got a few silly things planned. For one in less than two weeks some friends and myself are doing the Wolftrek - a 45 mile walk ending up at the top of Cairngorm, within 24 hours. Another is below.
I don't know if I can write in a way that is readable but this little short has been buzzing around my head for the past couple of days so I thought I'd try to get it down and one I'd written it I figured I'd ask for your comments. Good or bad but please be constructive, if not necessarily nice...

So here it is, a story about first contact.
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Assessing record – first contact:

“…We turn to our special correspondent on the scene of this, humanity’s first contact with another species! Janet, can you hear me?”

“Thank you Tim, yes, here we are less than ten years after the first messages were detected by the LISA observatory, and now we are waiting for the representative of the species known as the ‘Pa’adu’ to leave their craft and be welcomed by the UN delegation.
“There seems to be a small delay while the translation equipment is set up, and I am sure everyone watching will remember how the newly commissioned LISA orbiting gravitational wave interferometer picked up patterns in the background gravitational field, and the scientific furore surrounding the discovery that these patterns corresponded to the prime numbers in binary. It has been called the ‘defining moment of our generation’ by the world’s leaders; and yet even today some religious factions have decried the development of the Gravitational Communication Wave, or GCroW, as an affront to the divine plan for humanity, although of course the major religious leaders have distanced themselves from this view.
“We are still not sure what to expect when the emissary leaves the ship, as no visual transmission was been possible but all contact has led to the belief that the first life discovered outside of our own planet is peaceful. We know that the home-world of the Pa’adu is slightly smaller than Earth with a similar atmosphere, some 30 light years from our sun.
“Communication based on the mathematical system of the GCroW has led to what is now recognised as the decade of fastest development in computing, transport and engineering and there are great hopes for the fu… Hang on Tim, there seems to be something happening!”

“We’re getting a bit of interference here Janet, what can you see?”

“The vessel, transported by the Pa’adu to the prepared site, has changed! The once smooth shell is now folding back on itself and there is light coming from the inside. Two figures are emerging towards the waiting diplomatic party, they look to be wearing some kind of protective covering with what appears to be a life support system attached.
“I…I’m not sure if I can do justice to a description Tim but they look to be slightly smaller than a horse, with six legs and two arm like forelimbs, each ending in two pairs of pincers. They seem to have some kind of sensory centre like a head, at the front of their bodies. Of course as yet we don’t know if they have male and female genders, if they speak as we do or indeed anything except what has been released by the UN Extra-Terrestrial Research Alliance. Speaking at a press conference earlier, Dr Petra Davros of UNETRA told us to expect the delegates to speak through the translation equipment developed from discussion via the GCroW; and it looks like the first Pa’adu is approaching the translator.
“There seems to be something wrong, both Pa’adu are moving around, they’re saying something but the UNETRA feed has been disabled so we can’t hear anything. I’m trying to get closer but the security fence is preventing me moving any further.
“It looks like there is some discussion happening with the UN group. They seem upset and the alien pair are, yes, they are returning to their craft! I don’t know what is occurring but the UN delegates seem confused and rather angry. The Pa’adu craft is, I don’t believe it, it is leaving.
“I can see Dr Davros, she is coming over, Dr Davros, what happened?”

“Janet, hi, I… I am not sure. The visitors looked around, looked at us, said some things that we are not sure we translated correctly then left. The translation should have been accurate but it does not make any sense.”

“What did they say?”

“The parts we are most certain of were that we had not told them of our aggressive nature, of the fact we were hunters and hunters could not be trusted. The last phrase, I’m not sure, but it seems as though they found something wrong with the way we look. They have left now and I am not sure if we can recover from this diplomatic mess.
“We are seeking a better translation of the last phrase, as soon as we have it confirmed we will release a full press pack but if you will excuse me I have to get back.”

“Well Tim, I’m not sure what to say about the events of today….”

Record complete.
As you can see, class, this first meeting between humans and a non-Terran race went badly and it took thirty years before we managed to convince any other race that we were not as violent as they assumed. We worried at first that they had witnessed our history and were judging us by how we acted but eventually we found out that the Pa’adu and other were basing their assessment on our heritage and the final comments would be a sign of how so many other races would see us. These words show, possibly more than any others, that in all of the diversity in the universe, some rules of evolution and natural selection are indeed universal.
“How can we trust you? You are hunters, we will always be prey to such as you. You have eyes in the front of your head.”

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I'll be honest, I would expect most people's first reaction to be "wha?" but hey, I've written drivel on the blog before, why not this? Like I said, please feel free to tell me what you think. ;-D